Stalk Me, Please

20 Oct

I am very important. I am loved. I am hated. I am interesting. I am on your mind.

True story. 

I knew at some point the wrong people would find me in my little space of peace on the blogosphere. Last year, it was my cousin’s ex. Last week… my ex’s little friends and family.

Stalkers.

Sadly, they feel the need to continue to peruse my life via the internet, because I assume nothing is more interesting than me. And nothing is more interesting than the complaints and issues I choose to write about in regards to my ex. Somehow they take it personally. Why? Who knows.

Because of my deep importance in your life, I am choosing to address you via public forum.

This post is for you.

For those of you who continue to care what my life is like. For those who want so badly for my life to be in a shambles and see nothing of the sort. For those who want to report back to him about what is going on in my life, and that of the children…

This post is for you. 

I hope you are enjoying reading about my personal issues. I hope you are understanding that I am not only the person you hate, but I am a person who loves. I only want my happiness, just as many of you want your own. I have found my happiness. I have found it in my children, whom I continue to learn with every day. I have found happiness in my family, whom drive me crazy and many times I don’t get along with, but they’re still the family I was given. I found happiness in my boyfriend. A man who loves me unconditionally and I love in return in a healthy way that blows away any romance before him. I have found my happiness.

Have you found yours?

I am quite certain you will not find it here. I do not know what you are searching for. I am quite certain that my happiness is tearing you up inside because you only want my misery. Shame on you.

Funny story… I don’t actually want anyone to be genuinely miserable. Not even my pain in the ass ex. Sure, if something were to happen to him I would very likely feel nothing. His actions no longer concern me. They make for life lessons, though. Life lessons that have taught me a lot more about myself than I care to admit. They have taught me that there is so much more to people than meets the eye. They taught me a lot about how far a person can go to try to make it work. Or the lengths a person can go to get away from a situation. I have learned my emotional limits and that my patience is exceptional until I reach a breaking point.

My life has taught me that no one controls my happiness, except me. No one can make me feel inferior unless I allow them to. Nothing in this world could possibly be that bad that someone else isn’t going through worse.

Go ahead. Stalk me, please. Continue to follow my life and the trials and tribulations of the things you would never believe someone would speak about. Maybe one day you’ll understand. Maybe one day you will log off forever and move on with your own life.

In the meantime, I hope you have a good time trying to relay my words, my thoughts, and the beauty of my life that I am finally happy with. I hope you can see that through the terror of the relationship he and I had, I have still come out stronger for it. One day, he will be, too. One day he will get over it and be happy, but that is no longer in my control. It is his. And one day you will realize I am not the one to blame for everything because the the only blame lies within the person who continues to be tormented.

I have long ago forgiven myself. I have long ago forgiven him. I have long ago forgiven everyone who added to my pain… It is not my power to give someone their happiness.

Find yours. I know it is not here.

But if you believe your happiness is here on my blog, then by all means, log in, join the emailing list along with the other couple of hundred or so and read along in my journey to living a healthy and happy life.

Maybe you’ll make a cameo. Maybe you’ll get bored. Maybe you’ll learn something.

Who knows. Only you do. So, go ahead, stalk me, please. I am only continuing to stay on your mind, and this is the extent of you being on mine.

Welcome and good luck.

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4 Responses to “Stalk Me, Please”

  1. RawMultimedia October 20, 2013 at 10:08 PM #

    :)

  2. luciddream85 October 21, 2013 at 12:09 AM #

    Tell ‘em girl. They have nothing better to do than to try to find something of you to tear down. Pfffttt.

    • Theena Theen October 21, 2013 at 8:04 AM #

      I’m pretty honest here. My dad doesn’t like my lack of filter but I would much rather be honest than to continue being a liar like I was for a good portion of my life.

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